A cable network in Philadelphia made a hilarious blunder by accidentally broadcasting a segment of "girls gone wild" during a Good Friday broadcast of the Vatican mass made available to those who have conceded their ability to see god within themselves. Yes, Easter, yet another in a string of endless hominid pastimes that has been fine tuned to encourage mass consumption, and remind us that death by crucifixion awaits anyone who tells us to live in peace and harmony with one another, and to turn the other cheek, back and forth, back and forth, back and forth, until we are sitting on a chiropractors bed wondering why the fuck we couldn't have thought of something less painful.

Parents prepare to solidify in their child's minds, the notion of a giant rabbit who comes and hides candy from them in the night, which they must find the next morning! If only they knew the truth as illustrated in the following video....

Essentially, what many have considered a blunder could not be more symbolic of the hypocrisy inherent in Christianity and all religions, whether its catholic pedophile rings, or the Vatican's investments in oil corporations currently given free reign in Iraq, to their backwards views on sexuality, the girls gone wild glitch was ironically, quite appropriate. As if secularism and what is construed as "sinful" could not even be contained for a few hours during this fraudulent moment of repentance and humility.

Titney Rears

"Dont Smoke weed and rock out with your cocks out"???
Oh yes she did.

Titney fled the stage dramatically after complaining that the audience was smoking cigarettes and marijuana, not taking the time to reflect on this as an indication that she may in fact be cool... (which she apparently isnt). I was likely not the only one wondering what such rebellious legal aged people are thinking subjecting themselves to a Titney Rears concert... Anyways the truth is that the smell of plot likely triggered Britney to go backstage and fire up the bong! DONT SMOKE MARIJAUNA!!! DRINK AND DO LEGAL DRUGS INSTEAD!!!

FOX NEWS: Who you naturally are is a ugly worthless piece of shit?

Female members of hominid species are encouraged to make vanity the focal point of their existence... again. The Fox news headline has assisted in making the point of debate not what one should change, but what you shouldn't! Females, like the males, have a value system that revolves around the opinions of others, that is, if other people like you (even if they like an element of you that is not real) then you have free market value, completely oblivious to the fact that are a inconstant collection of cells and vile bodily fluids held together by a deceptive endoskeleton that seldom comes together for the task of thinking...

Abraham Maslow (reknown humanist psychologist) theorized that the majority of the population were suspended in the stage of getting their self-esteem from the regard of others, rather then themselves. He held that this was more prevalent in women due to social conditioning. If only he was alive to see this modern perfection seeking money grubbing gongshow today!

Since the contrived recession of the fake economy caught wind, overall plastic surgery procedures have declined 9%, down significantly from the 12 million procedures done last year alone! (IN THE US) On the flipside 'minimally invasive procedures' (or more cost effective and non-surgical methods of trying to improve ones self-esteem) such as Botox and laser hair removal have increased 5%. The modern female is best described as such:

Billy Bob Thornton: An asshole who is right?

Billy Bob Thornton (actor, wannabee musician) became very defensive when asked how his celebrity status has aided his music career. Apparently the movie host has a rockstar inferiority complex of sorts and would like to entertain the delusion that his shitty unoriginal music is what sells tickets. Right. But it was Thorntons accurate remarks about Canadian audiences that received worldwide notoriety, insisting that the audiences are too reserved, and likened them to "mash potatoes without gravy"... Oh no!!! WE SHOULD REALLY GIVE A FUCK!!! And is he really wrong Canada? Is it true that Canadians lack style and are typically too inhibited to let loose and have a good time? Of course. I usually wonder what people think when the come to perform in this neurotically isolated  country only to have a bunch of people standing there over analyzing what it is they are doing instead of having a good time. Lets face it, we are by and large a bland and stuck up society, whose pampered lifestyles wont afford us the struggles required to transcend this conscientious cage of activity and do crazy shit... We borrow all our cultural mannerisms from the ghetto (with the exception of such achievements as the Royal Canadian Air Farce, quite frankly the whitest show ever created in the history of time, reflective of the Canadian Parliament), and what artistic prowess we do possess can likely be attributed to our endless supply of high quality B.C. buds. So don't be offended by this guy, for one he is an asshole whose band is rightly suited to these talentless crowds, and secondly he is right, we need to loosen our collars, adapt some fucking style the oppressive conditions required for which will start becoming apparent... now.

Darwin Olympics

Was she some kind of ecofundamentalist giving herself as an offering to the hard done by Polar bear, or just the latest victim of big pharma? Well as it turns out the woman claimed to be depressed that she couldnt find a job. Wow. How about not having anything to eat or being shelled indiscriminatley by illegal weapons. Or maybe even educate yourself and resist the system that keeps you enslaved... no, go and jump into a polar bear cage. GENIUS!!! Big pharmas gonna love you!

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