And so it was the worst of the best of times. All communication was reduced to byte sized palatable morsels, fast food, fast news, fast truths, fast wars, fast mores, a series of broadbanded digital transactions knitted our shallow collective into an vulnerable problem waiting to happen. And within the human sphere of relevance on that fine day, a smorgasbord of mindless supersized trends, media distractions and deceptive ends, were circulated yet again, to dope the masses of people moved by fearing in others what they prided in themselves.

They had finally caught up with us in the tunnels... I became one of them... and all I had were these faint glitch memories that pass over my remaining neurons as I blast the remaining humans with massive fk you microwave guns like a good cyborg should!!!!

HERE WAS THE FKING NEWS THAT WEEK!

*Click on images to view corresponding articles

HEADLINES!!!

Patriotic T & A to sell next war to easily satisfied zombie populous!!! YAY!!!

Looks like sex will be used to lubricate the flag waving idiot machine for gulf wars 3 when that time should arise. Lets just hope that T & A are incapable of getting the males to do anything stupid... yeah. Or be realistic and admit we are fucked! The two woman's rights activists that remain can take refuge in the fact that the military industrial saleswomen are also being encouraged to work on their technical skills in response to findings that American males are to overweight to fight...

Faux News insists 14% of Pop believe women should be beaten??? for... being patriots???

Patriot girls, after serving their term of mandated volunteerism, are to be ridiculed and beaten with a wooden stick no bigger then their obese husbands thumb... But not until they have completed their term of duty to their country which according to Fox news, Jesus Christ has approved directly.

Rioting at Americas Next Top Model auditions

The battle of the bimbos kicks off with a face stomping bang as 6 soon to be anorexic, divorced, and clinically depressed females who sought to sell the only thing available in abundance on the free market right now, are trampled in a haste to cumulate false self-esteem. The task of fitting the cookie cutout expectations of a mass of ding dong knitwits, was not an aspiration in short supply this week, as Tyra Banks pretended to act amazed that such hysteria could ensue over something so trivial and meaningless in a population of patriot girls bent on being overly self-conscious and not thinking.

Octomoms and recessions

With the slight side effect of entailing a life of embarrassment and rejection from her 14 state owned children, Octomom would be wise to consider the offer being made by Vivid entertainment who have already devised a storyline for the would be superstar...

Starring: Ron Jeremy and 7 of his clones as "the bad guys"
In theatres soon