Introduction

Before we blow our tops in one of many anti-establishment valentines day rants to manifest in the blogosphere this year, it should be noted that Fadsmashers doesn't critique the practice of doing good things for others, or love in general. In spite of this behaviors apparent lesser role in human evolution, goodwill has stood the test of time, and as such is not necessarily a fashion or a fad, but arguably a natural biological necessity. What the Greeks referred to as Agape love, or an 'unconditional appreciation of everything, is something that can only be smashed by itself. Think about that. Or dont. I likely dont really give a shit... but the point is as much as we try to relate valentines day to these more enlightened types of love the more this mindfk holiday is revealed for what it really is: A gimmick that exploits what matters most to 99.9% of people, that unexplainable euphoric sex crazed uber state of affairs surrounding the act of procreating termed... romantic love. Just keep worrying about petty relationships issues and catering to your own base level human needs you bitch slaves you (a sinister voice uttered to the avail of no one), we will take care of everything else!!!

Remember: make erotic detached love and not war: Except of course in the following geographical regions: Africa, Asia, Eastern Europe, South America and last but not least the middle east.

Before we begin this Valentines day rant, a quick word from Fox news: Those termed 'celebrities' (or those to be celebrated because they act out unachievable idealistic scenarios that drive our insatiable lusts for cool shit) have disclosed some petty details of their lives set to be modeled by millions of unemployed people who are completely uninterested in organizing and challenging the clear as day highway robbery that ensures their enslavement and processing through the capitalist machine at the mere expense of the suffering of billions of their fellow hominid members... Happy Valentines day!

And who really gives a fuck!

All you need is love: and useless shit from corporate slave states that has no functional value whatsoever

No more then 2 months since the last gasping plea to save unaccountable bankster corps that sought to bleed us dry had passed, has yet another monetary obligation forced the fiat from our receding bank accounts. Of all the corporate holidays that play off of our collective inadequacies in order to hoist the fake economy, none could be more deceptive and counterproductive to what it intends then one ‘Valentines day’. As if it weren’t bad enough that North Americans allotted one day out of the year to spend 20 billion on corporate product based loving, it is more perplexing that it is sandwiched between 364 days of oppression, war, rabid consumerism, and stimulation by way of contrived political and entertainment scandals that the brain dead degenerate western TV addicts require to vicariously live real lives through. The day is incomplete without redistributing billions into the hands of multinationals to win the affection of people they are in legal contract with!

For a limited time only, you too can work towards a relationship that is as likely to suceed as it is to end in a divorce, by ensuring that the only bond you have to your insignificant other is that which can be calculated quantitatively in the frivolous accumulation of mass produced sentimentalities reaped from the not so developing world. Show them how unique YOUR love is by buying them mass produced shit! But before the easily corrupted gold diggers take you for all your worth, try to prolong the romantic aspect of the delusion by bestowing upon them an array of useless shit extracted from countries far away such as overpriced genetically modified (bee-free!) floral arrangements, perhaps blood diamonds from the African Congo, or a trip to one of the many British colonial vacation spots, or maybe just a box of chocolates with cocoa picked by the lowly African slaves (who don’t need food much less love) to prove to the one who will (as statistics show) likely leave your ass for someone better, that you are an incompetent tool that tryed to buy their affection!

Soon to be single, dime a dozen morons who try to buy their way into the hearts and underpants of their girlfriends will be happy to know that there are no limitations on the spraying of pesticides in the floriculture of Africa, Brazil, India and similar countries that ship these -will help my sorry ass get laid- flowers to the western world, allowing for increased production ensuring the contamination and desertification of arable land in order to bring you shit that is still overpriced in the end anyway thanks to the prices they decided to fucking jack up 3 weeks ago!!! YIPPIE!!!!!!!!!!!!

In addition, precious water supplies and wildlife that sustained the ancient civilizations of the 3rd world will be adversely impacted by the wasteful practices entailed in consumers yet again... trying to feel good about themselves... but what what the fuck else is new!!! No matter where emotion bubbles up we will be sure to cap that shit, and pump the profits into our government backed bank accounts! Thankfully, local impoverished communities have now grown dependent on these self-destructive industries run by foreign companies, and are thus expected to defend the ecological malpractice to the death of themselves.

Only 100$ for this overpriced completley unnaturally natural looking flower in a vase that is going to fucking die in 2 weeks like the person who made it anyway. If this colossal waste of time, energy and resources doesn’t say I love you, then I hope this piece of paper marked prenuptial agreement does!!! Fadsmashers correspondent Nathan Human made it out to the mall (city) to see what some consumers (slaves who are fast approaching being obsolete in every respect asides from emitting carbon) are saying:

“O wow, it was all worth it to reinforce her delusion that she is the only one I think about.”

“There’s no better way to show someone you love them then by partaking in mindless cultural fads, although I sometimes feel that in buying my girlfriend token novelties made in china I am being a little too original though”

“I would really like my boyfriend to spend more quality time with me, but I also want diamonds, flowers and other useless shit too”

“It doesn’t matter what he gets me for Valentines Day, it’s the thought of someday buying me something expensive that counts”

“It makes me feel very special to get the same kind of mass produced shit as every other girl I know, it really makes me feel appreciated you know what I mean?”

“Hopefully I don’t have to send myself flowers to feel as valuable as the other catty bitches who fill subservient roles in the office I work at, like last year”

Show her that you are a worthy mark by spending what little money the government will leave you this year to tweak the delusion that you were ‘meant to be together’, or that “you are the only one for them” and are not but one of many suitable mates they likely would have bumped into at some point down the road. When in doubt of the authenticity of your intense infatuation, label what you share to be a ‘kindred’ relationship, that wasn’t something you simply conceded your American dream for… Desperate housewives is coming to a TV set near you to remind you that you deserve better too!

If you are someone who is not in ‘possession’ of one of these insignificant others and are considering rolling solo this year, we would encourage you to ruminate on your loner ass until the point of what we will call ‘clinical depression’ and visit our affiliates in big pharma for side effecting solutions.

Don’t worry, the 24 hr hallmark holiday will be followed by the usual 364 days of destruction and chaos you now require to weather your isolated existence devoid of the vital challenges that helped your predecessors evolve.

Happy culture of procreation day everyone!!!

 The leader of the Christian religious delusion gave a Christmas address in which he offered numerous hypocritical messages imperative to the maintenance of the status quo. He insists that the world is headed towards catastrophe if the slaves he misleads begin to practice the selfishness that he and the rich have mastered. In addition he spoke out against "internecine conflict" between ethnic and social groups (i.e. not the Israelis and Palis, nor the Christian right supported interventionist polices in the Middle East, nor any form of Zionism for that matter, nor the dialectic between the rich and poor or any division worth noting). He went out of his way to comment on the Zimbabwe cholera epidemic doing his part in vilifying any African who doesn’t bow to Christian and globalist integration, he did not criticize sanctions against the country which have caused the poverty and injustice to ensue. In addition he denounced the kind of terrorism which is retaliation from invaded and culturally pillaged populations. This is yet another in a string of appearances in which the Christian delusion is being used to quelch rebellion. In a completely unrelated story the Vatican has investments in the following: JP Morgan bank, Chase Manhattan bank, The First National Bank of New York, the Bankers Trust company, as well as large investments with the Rothschild’s banks in Britain, France and America, to name a few!

Queen dissuades slaves from rebelling

Queen Elizabeth (the one who is given upwards of 37 million a year to wipe her ass with gold laced toilet paper and look pretty), delivers a Christmas message to her 1.9 billion subjects. In light of the recession the Queen is still being paid to do absolutely nothing, as her misguided subjects rationalize this useless symbolism for its tourist lure... She endowed us with her insights in saying that...

"Over the years, those who have seemed to me to be the most happy, contented and fulfilled have always been the people who have lived the most outgoing and unselfish lives."

Yeah. Ok Mrs. 'epitome of being born with a silver spoon in my fucking mouth' I am humbled that you and the pope have undertaken this joint endeavor at dissuading my proletariat cohorts from rebelling against the unjust capitalist system which only bleeds them dry from cradle to grave!

Muchos Gracias!

And thank you for instructing us to be even more outgoing and not take the time to introspect and soul search and develop our own reasoning capacities independently which may lead us to realizing how completely redundant you are to the world. Thank you for reserving the trait of selfishness to your circle of friends!

Iraqis are forced to recognize Christmas as a national holiday! In addition to having a democracy which entails their resource wealth privatized by the infringing colonialist power, insult is added to the predominantly Muslim society’s injury by being twisted into partaking in the new occupier’s own covert church and state integrations.

NORAD's Santa tracking center answered thousands of calls and responded to 10,000 e-mails from children who have been brainwashed and permanently prepped . Millions of children and their deceiving parents view the website each year as the 50 year tradition of wasting taxpayer’s money on propagating corporate myths that encourage excess materialism continue, while CIA proxy terrorists are allowed to fly planes into buildings unfettered!

22 million turkeys partake in 3rd turkey holocaust of the year, as thousands of people who are too top heavy to stand in a picket lines, celebrate receding incomes, miseducation and the creation of unmanned eugenicizing killing machines, which is owed to their chosen apathy throughout the year 2008, pledging to do so with even greater freedumb and forbearance next year!

In addition to paying blissful ignorance to the shambled world they will leave their children, they will continue to play pretend and persist in the delusion that everything is ok because anything else would mean they were being pessimistic and depressed, and that would be a drag on idiots who need to celebrate the squandered possibilities of the human race! Just keep smiling and waving to the cameras in the eyes of those they are to afraid to speak their mind around, like good little alienated self-serving bitches!

The annual tree holocaust commences, as millions prepare to partake in the most elaborate idiocy fueled marketing ploys of all time, which is now serves as a cornerstone to the fake western economy.

50 million trees that take up arable land space and ingest CO2 will be put to their deaths, only to first be humiliated and covered with wasteful decorations, and energy wasting Christmas lights, for the sake of pleasing their brainwashed guests and neighbors people avoid talking too throughout the year. The insatiable mass of bottom feeding pond scum will then burn the trees to celebrate what they have been conditioned to believe is the “new year”!

Turkeys lives are spared in the annual Turkey holocaust, as broke Americans celebrating the colonial holiday and genocide of 10 million Native American Indians using biological weapons and heinous military raids are forced to settle for mass produced toxic chickens instead.

Cincinnati and numerous cities across the United States of Israel participate in the age old tradition of ‘Turkey bowling’.

Yes.... Because what’s really important in the midst of the fake financial collapse and fast tracked disproportional wealth distribution is the tradition of throwing dead frozen bird carcasses down an ice rink to knock things down, while soon to be criminals salivate on the sidelines… North Americans who are still too preoccupied being consumers with their miniscule priorities such as being scared of establishment funded boogeymen, balancing their shrinking budgets, and playing radioactive video games with their soon to be conscripted children, insist that everything is just fine as they blissfully carry on ‘hoping’ that their corrupt overlords will evolve a sense of virtue.