Boob Jobs for Babies: No Surgery Required
Posted by Megan Van Schaick on September 7, 2010 at 7:15 PM
They've done it again folks! The geniuses behind such products as lead-tainted toys, fire-starting batteries, and poisonous toothpaste are proud to announce a new little surprise sure to please every mother and child: boob jobs for baby -- and surgery-free!
Yes, it's true, girls no longer have to wait until puberty to grow breasts. They can now get a head start on all the other girls and avoid the agony of waiting for things to finally develop. Now they can start growing breasts as infants!
How are these babies blossoming so early? Easy! The babies miraculously grow boobs using a secret formula. No, not that formula, the one that they drink. Several times a day. Every day. Boob-growing baby formula ... what will they think of next?
Infants in China who have been drinking Synutra formula are growing breasts because they have as much estrogen in their bodies as adult women. They were also found to have abnormal levels of the hormones that stimulate lactation.
There are at least three known affected babies, all between 4 and 15 months old. One mother, Deng Xiaoyun, told the Chinese-owned Global Times newspaper, "At first, I thought it was a tumor. But hospital doctors preliminarily diagnosed it as symptom of sexual prematurity caused by hormones.”
Wang Gang’s doctor actually asked her if it was possible that her daughter had ingested birth control pills.
Those aforementioned hormones would be the ones given to the dairy cows -- just as BGH is used here in the States -- to force milk production. And what goes into the milk goes into the milk powder, which then goes into the infants.
READ MORE
Posted by Megan Van Schaick on September 7, 2010 at 7:15 PM
They've done it again folks! The geniuses behind such products as lead-tainted toys, fire-starting batteries, and poisonous toothpaste are proud to announce a new little surprise sure to please every mother and child: boob jobs for baby -- and surgery-free!
Yes, it's true, girls no longer have to wait until puberty to grow breasts. They can now get a head start on all the other girls and avoid the agony of waiting for things to finally develop. Now they can start growing breasts as infants!
How are these babies blossoming so early? Easy! The babies miraculously grow boobs using a secret formula. No, not that formula, the one that they drink. Several times a day. Every day. Boob-growing baby formula ... what will they think of next?
Infants in China who have been drinking Synutra formula are growing breasts because they have as much estrogen in their bodies as adult women. They were also found to have abnormal levels of the hormones that stimulate lactation.
There are at least three known affected babies, all between 4 and 15 months old. One mother, Deng Xiaoyun, told the Chinese-owned Global Times newspaper, "At first, I thought it was a tumor. But hospital doctors preliminarily diagnosed it as symptom of sexual prematurity caused by hormones.”
Wang Gang’s doctor actually asked her if it was possible that her daughter had ingested birth control pills.
Those aforementioned hormones would be the ones given to the dairy cows -- just as BGH is used here in the States -- to force milk production. And what goes into the milk goes into the milk powder, which then goes into the infants.
READ MORE
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