A typical form of thought-stopping is the misplaced accusation that in being cynical, one is necessarily being negative. The term 'cynicism' is thrown around like Palestinians trying to get through Jewish checkpoints, and equally so it is a phenomenon that is poorly understood. Conveniently, it silences any form of thought that is sceptical and denies the dubious inclinations that distinguish us from chimpanzees, gorillas, and baboons. If I had a dime for every time someone called me cynical in an attempt to be constructive but in a condescending sort of way to compensate for their own unawareness (simply because I chose to see things realistically) I could buy myself a few packs of smokes, and a fkn 6 pack (thats alot in Canada). Yeah realistically I say, and pardon the flaming embrace of my own subjectivity, but lets get real. Anyway... because people do not want to concern themselves with the harshness of reality, they would rather make the concession to swim in a sea of bullshit then make a contribution to cleaning it up. Hey now, I have been there before, 2:00 AM, dance floor, self-invested, grind machine, lusting after any cleavage the room had to share, completely oblivious to my enslavement, but its fun and I dont condemn this, but I grew. I will from time to time go on vacation and forget about everything I know, and submerse myself in the waters of ignorance and idiocy for a few cheap laughs for the sake of increasing my immunity and staving off cancer for another year, but like a boomerang I retract, back to the facts... Jack. Before I completely tear the conventional understanding of the word cynicism into a thousand pieces its important that we examine its etymology.

Here is the traditional understanding of the philosophy of cynicism:

1) Cynicism (Kυνισμός) was originally the philosophy of a group of ancient Greeks called the Cynics, founded by Antisthenes. The Cynics rejected all conventions, whether of religion, manners, housing, dress, or decency, advocating the pursuit of virtue in a simple and unmaterialistic lifestyle.

*it should be added that the term cynic was derived from the term canine, indicating that to be one, was to live the life of the dog. Wild like dogs they were. So wild in fact, they could not be caged, it was necessary that they were marginalized, and prevented from ever re-entering into society to spread their unique perspectives. But the jokes on facebook.

This branch of philosophy originates with a definition which seems ironically to resemble the life of the hippy, long hair, no concern for social presentation (sure this is debatable as they are living up to an image too but...), dropping out of society to persue a greater self-understanding and most importantly seeking virtue (the ultimate virtue). That is they aspire to obtain the ultimate good, and must thereby bypass the bullshit drenched culture, because culture is a front for the truth. However... most contemporary pseudo-hippies would consider themselves humanists (a philosophy in direct opposition to cynicism, or the modern definition of cynicism that is), that is, those in pursuit of understanding the world in their own terms, devoted to self-discovery, and most importantly a belief that human beings are inherently good. Just like a traditional cynic although in a contemporary sense the cynic has somehow been construed as someone who doesnt believe humans are inherently good. This I argue is wrong. The latter half of this traditional definition of cynicism (pursuit of virtue) has been all but lost in its contemporary definition. Here are some of those more up to date definitions:

A more recent definition:
2) A sceptical, scornful or pessimistic attitude, comment or act (note: the guilt by association between pessimism and scepticism, because to be sceptical one must also be pessimistic).

The modern understanding:
3) The belief in the worst of people or the outcome of events.

Now how the fk did we get from there (aspiring to virtue), to here (Murphy’s fkn law slut)... lets ponder further...

How the negative connotation of cynicism was acquired is open to speculation. Perhaps it was a drawn out game of socio-historical telephone that distorted the true meaning of the concept. However, it would be quite fitting to the powers that were (are), to marginalize those who sought to think for themselves, who rejected the system, and were not dependent on it. Therefore it would be in their interest to malform the concept of cynicism (thinking for oneself) into an anti-social, negative act, one in which the common person would be repulsed by. Creating a social stigma against being critical of society by labeling people who did so cynics. Within this definition of course, the cynic has no end in mind, they simply enjoy being a pessimistic asshole for the sake of being one right? You’ll notice that the modern definition is completely ignorant to the most fundamental aspect of the original definition that is; to seek virtue!!!! Basically the modern definition contains all the negative means and none of the positive ends, in essence the conception of modern cynicism has been shaped by its own standards quite cynically. So people are modern-ly cynical about traditional cynics. WTF is going on here yee might say? Are you trying to tell me that these desperate, hopeless bitchers are actually more moral than me?

Fkn rights homie, the real cynics are those who have conceded the ideal as nothing more than an unattainable distraction away from our priceless sensationalist,3 second attention span based amusements, why waste time thinking when we could do more fkn??? Now, now, he uses bad words you say. Yes, but stop being so damn 'cynical' and dream of the possibilities... .... .... wasnt that refreshing... Fk yeah!

What do you think motivates the cynic? Where do you think their dislike of the 'system' originates? Is it A) The unrelenting hate they possess for humanity or 2) Because they constantly are forced to bear witness to an uncritical unappreciative mass of people who possess no ideals or interest in virtue, and are quite content wanting nothing more than a stagnant snail paced social progress that is spoon fed to them like the infantile bottom-feeding pond scum they emanate. They are quite content with the lesser of an evil, whereas the cynic ultimately aspires to true good, by the traditional understanding of a cynic that is... The true understanding. I think these cynics should be avoided by the 'in crowd' because they may brainfk them into realizing they are being manipulated by people with the fake $$$ who possess the same knowledge as the cynic.

Look around you, all of this stuff was made by people who chose to commit themselves self-lessly to the cause of humanity, only to have their creations exploited by the likes of happy-go -lucky self-proclaimed optimists who dont want anything to do with them! So hug a nerd today, ok? These anti-social geniuses were so by definition, because intellect is not revered in this society of idiotic, Rick rolling and bad chuck Norris joke loving, ingrates. Because in this society we first and foremost value bullshit, we are quite content not aspiring to anything more than dressing ourselves up and going out on the town without ever considering the big picture. And lets not forget about loving life, yeah loving it so much you couldnt care less about any other than your own!!! I dont have time to chart the path between humanism and capitalism, but will surely illuminate the issue some other time...

Naked monkeys concealing their true nature in sweatshop mended 'designer' fabrics, driving combustible engine vehicles down paved roads made of rock mulch to the nearest cologne infested sweat shack were they can intoxicate themselves with liquid that dehydrates them... (LIQUID THAT DEHYDRATES THEM) in order to better their chances of consummating with some other monkey whose breath fkn reaks, on a sticky floor, upon which thousands of other monkeys have listened to generic rhythms countless times before. Yeah if that doesn’t ring superstar, world-class asset to the human race I don’t no WTF does... OK maybe I look at it too narrowly you might be think... perhaps even cynically in a modern sense, and I would agree if this mentality didnt characterize 99% of our other cultural norms and mores. Whew. Take it easy with those thoughts, dont forget this is just a big joke to me ok... I am completley detached... yes, and covering bases.

A cynic in the modern sense
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a15KgyXBX24

So in essence, the cynic is more optimistic about enhancing humanity than any of these self-important smiles ever could be. They see the potential of humanity, where as the residual button pushers seek to squander their achievements on themselves.

Let me catch my breath.......................... Assuredly, at this point, most will be saying, wow, this guy is truly negative, hes seriously fkn lost it, I mean where does he get off being so cyni... BUT WAIT!!!!! Have you not learned a thing??? Its because I love life, and love it so much that to see it wasted in such a way is a travesty. This may be hard to see beneath my boorish and seemingly hateful statements, but I am head strong, happy, and clearly dont give a fk. Enough self-justifying...

Anyway...
So we can tolerate the fact that Canada’s 4 parties donated 30 million of our money to fund their own campaigns, ignorant to the other dozen parties with lucrative platforms, which they seek to ignore, but really... 9/11 transpired just as we were told by the mindfk media, we are bringing the Iraqis 'freedom', Iran is full of haters, Israel is a legitimate infringement upon the Palestine, we are not interested in protecting oil and opium interests in Afghanistan, the CIA isn’t engineering the rock, we live in a democracy and money in fact has some basis in reality other then an unspoken social contract between us and a few assholes who make the stuff, (THAT WE DIDNT EVEN GET TO SIGN!!!) yeah I should just stop being so bloody 'cynical' throw one on the barbe and STFU eh! Fine then for your sake, I will. But...

Block out the fact that we are bombing, exploiting and brainwashing the following and carry on, like it never happened!!! Because there is no solution, we must roll over and take it up the pipe!!!

AND THAT MY FRIENDS IS TRUE CYNICISM.

Lets hit the club BECAUSE I NEEDZ TO GITZ FKD UP WIT MY NIKKAZ!!!!!
Seriously I live in fkn Saskatchewan WTF am I doing with my life. Shoot me.

Sincerely yours to repress deeply